Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Friday, May 26, 2006
Friday, May 19, 2006
no, the bugger isn't dead.
'Coz apparently some people give a fuck about this kinda stuff : let it be known, Shah Rukh Khan is still amongst the living.
"News" of his death spread virally through the medium of the 'forwarded email', causing wide-spread anxiety and great alarm. Countless women in office blocks the country over donned mourning mantles and proceeded to name their godchildren Shah Rukh/Rahul as a tribute to the fallen bollywood icon. A sense of utter bereftness cast its pall, for no longer would that devillish smiled and floppy-fringed goofball run on powder-snowed slopes in his that-is-so-hot-ya-Polo muscle-tee with arms outstretched in gayful glee lipsyncing to "aaahhhh...ah hah hah ah hah hah....".
Fortunately, News24 tracked down the perpetrator of the cruel, cruel hoax; one Aman Singh, before any distraught fans could commit suicide by arad-poisoning while clutching their Kuch Kuch Hota Hai/K3G special edition dual-dvds.
"News" of his death spread virally through the medium of the 'forwarded email', causing wide-spread anxiety and great alarm. Countless women in office blocks the country over donned mourning mantles and proceeded to name their godchildren Shah Rukh/Rahul as a tribute to the fallen bollywood icon. A sense of utter bereftness cast its pall, for no longer would that devillish smiled and floppy-fringed goofball run on powder-snowed slopes in his that-is-so-hot-ya-Polo muscle-tee with arms outstretched in gayful glee lipsyncing to "aaahhhh...ah hah hah ah hah hah....".
Fortunately, News24 tracked down the perpetrator of the cruel, cruel hoax; one Aman Singh, before any distraught fans could commit suicide by arad-poisoning while clutching their Kuch Kuch Hota Hai/K3G special edition dual-dvds.
Monday, May 15, 2006
shot left, after robot
I miss taking the taxi's down Jan Smuts Avenue to the gym.
It doesn't get anymore real than the dented soccer-stickered metal, the only barrier to you and kissing tar held together by kite string, your legs warmed by pure engine heat and its fumes, oh how i miss the fumes; so strong they slice your tongue into ribbons.
And the passengers, silent squashed faces of static between stops, except for the one man who said the black people he knew never found the time to gym because they were too busy working.
It doesn't get anymore real than the dented soccer-stickered metal, the only barrier to you and kissing tar held together by kite string, your legs warmed by pure engine heat and its fumes, oh how i miss the fumes; so strong they slice your tongue into ribbons.
And the passengers, silent squashed faces of static between stops, except for the one man who said the black people he knew never found the time to gym because they were too busy working.
Monday, May 08, 2006
of course, he gets off.
Not Guilty. The Zuma camp cheers.
Of course, it could all just be a grand conspiracy, a tribally motivated plot hatched in the name of discrediting a man pegged for the presidency. Rape charges, corruption charges, yep, there's definitely some dark malignant force at hand here. We all know where Dan Brown's getting the material for his next book. And they all lived happily ever after kids. Except for the 15-year-old whose boyfriend just gave her Aids and a baby, coz Msholozi set a fine example.
Lessons learned from the Zuma rape trial:
Having unprotected sex with an HIV+ person is no big deal if you take a
shower afterwards.
How you dress is a clear indication of your sexual intent.
If you are the victim of rape, you better make damned sure you've got a
sexual history that would make Mother Theresa look easy.
Of course, it could all just be a grand conspiracy, a tribally motivated plot hatched in the name of discrediting a man pegged for the presidency. Rape charges, corruption charges, yep, there's definitely some dark malignant force at hand here. We all know where Dan Brown's getting the material for his next book. And they all lived happily ever after kids. Except for the 15-year-old whose boyfriend just gave her Aids and a baby, coz Msholozi set a fine example.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
gymrat goes glutton/gourmand ... (first course)
Not a message from our sponsors.
Jozi's Best:
Mochaccino - Fournos (Dunkeld West Centre)
Hot Chocolate - Leonida's (Sandton/Hyde Park)
Breakfast - Betty's Tea Room (44 Stanley Avenue, Milpark), Woolworths.
Baked Cheesecake with Chocolate Brownie Base - The Wild Olive (Melville)
Jozi's Best:
Mochaccino - Fournos (Dunkeld West Centre)
Hot Chocolate - Leonida's (Sandton/Hyde Park)
Breakfast - Betty's Tea Room (44 Stanley Avenue, Milpark), Woolworths.
Baked Cheesecake with Chocolate Brownie Base - The Wild Olive (Melville)
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