Monday, October 09, 2006

not the avon lady (2)

This is why people put notices outside their office to deter salespeople (ref:post)
We moved to new offices in March this year. Since then I've been propositioned to purchase the following items:
  • a keyring-size camera (really low-grade spy vs spy gadget)
  • a flying toy monkey that emitted demonic screeches when you fling it across the room
  • a 36-piece dinner set (lifetime guarantee, and if one of the ugly brown saucers break, they'll replace it for free with another ugly brown saucer, so you'll never be embarassed about having an incomplete ugly brown dinner service)
  • full piece cutlery set (we stopped the sales guy before he could demonstrate how balanced the heft in each knife was)
  • pepper spray (If i didn't already have a cannister, I would've forked over dosh for this one)
  • stainless steel waterless cookware (the monthly installments on these are about as much as my car repayments)
  • insurance (times 55)
  • photocopy machines (times 40)
  • assorted fluffy toys that give off manic noises when you squeeze them (see above pic)
Despite my ire at being disturbed during a mad chase for deadline, I have respect for salespeople. They have one of the most shitest jobs. Perhaps not as bad as those guys who are charged with emptying out the buckets in rudimentary latrines, but having to put on your happy-happy-joy-joy face for 8 hours and set yourself up for utter rejection puts them right at the bottom of the ladder. And you've got to respect someone who has the bravado to walk from office to office, full of rehearsed enthusiasm for a product they wouldn't personally buy, run through an arduous promotional spiel, face indifference by their audience and still have the energy and civility to say "Thank you ma'am, have a nice day".
So to all my sales-peeps, while I may not feel the desire to own the muppet-reject anytime soon, thank you for sharing and you, you have a nice day.


the guy who writes this crap said...

yup...i could never sell stuff. why don't we have these people where I work?? I mean there's enough flying screeching monkeys where i work, but I sure could use that pepper spray at my meetings:
Me: "What?! you aren't going to approve my budget?! Take that"
Them: "AHH!! My eyes! My eyes! OK! its approved"
Me: "eeeeexcellent. bwhahaha!"
Them: "You bastard! even my boogers are spicy!"
Me: "eew"

M Junaid said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ahmed said...

I didn't know sales people just go randomly office to office, I always though it was just house to house.

Hanna said...

Ditto Ahmed.. I was under that impression too.. although I must admit, sometimes they're most welcome!! In Dubai, we have this Chinese guy who comes around with his fake DVDs. The door's always open to him :)

Muhammad said...

While I'm here... would you like to buy this cute little plastic chimpanzee which squeaks everytime you get spam mail?




P.S. MJ... oh my... I can sense the pursuit from here.. is that burning tyres i smell?

M Junaid said...

Brother M - if i was being affectionate, i would not call Saal a kebab, now would i ( kebab means grilled or broiled meat - not the most affectionate term - as for the tyre burning smell - lets not forget- you do live in an Densely Indian populated area, where every guys wet dream is to modify their citi golf :)
much luv to Mo and Saal

Ahmed said...

haha, I saw the 'mumbled while chewing' on hanna's post and thought thats weird...or she was really enjoying iftar or something...and then i just noticed its on everyones thing haha. cool :)

Fatima said...

why oh WHY couldn't i find the salesman with the flying screeching monkey?
i'm feeling rather letdown atm :(

hey..the guy with the dinnerware set ... haha...he approached me when I was still working in's an ugly brown and it's too expensive.

but i do feel sorry for salespeople, it's a really crappy job and i wouldn't want to do it.

queen_Lestat said...

we get people who come and pimp stuff at campus too, just today this guy comes and leaves his card with me, in case "I'm in need of an editor" -_-

I felt bad, didn't want to point out that that's my job too, felt even worse when I saw the misuse of an apostrophe on his biz card. Poor guy....

Z said...

buy something at least!?

zee said...

i would def have bought the flying screeching monkey!

i bought a vase once...and a fancy filofax which i never used, cause i have a pda...a talking rabbit for the little kid at our premises that day...attar and 5 plugs.

there is this guy that comes to out premises - claims he's only doing this cause he needs the money to register as a doctor here...apparently in nigeria he's a registered doctor.

oh yes and an offer for a photocopier;)

M Junaid said...

man touting lifestyle
bag fill, defective imports
door slam imminent

Sorry kebab - i'm in a haiku mood

cellardoor said...

last year at christmas a sales man came 2 r work, and i paid tenner (!!!) 4 one of those mechanic soft toys - a lion- sooo cool cos they sing 'in the jungle, the mighty jungle - the line sleeps 2nite....whooo...'
but trust me the novelrty wears off eventually...

Z said...

haha cellar! being a leo i love that song! trust me the novelty would never wear off!

btw the african chorus goes something like "awimbaweh awimbaweh..." incidently, I believe that the descdendants of the composer sued Disney for Royalties lately and won...:)

Bilal said...

Salesman really have it tough- you just have to admire their energy!

Mak- why you giving MJ a hard time! You married guys need to be helping the bachelors out- not crushing them:-P
Now you made the guy delete his comment!
MJ- what did it say? Dont worry about Mak:-P

saaleha said...

z: ok, i'll buy something mushy and fluffy the next time and just leave it outside your flat ok? you can deal with the clutter :)

i'm normally a softie when it comes to ppl selling stuff to me, but i refuse to buy things i don't need.

M Junaid said...

Hey B
its the same post - i just ommited the word "hug". Guess uncle Mak was getting all possesive and what not - but he is right you know - cant be hugging and what not in Ramadaan - Oh Shawwaal - I await thee patiently

cellardoor said...

z - thats the same song - and i'm a leo..and i got sick of it.... having said that - it will be back out from the draw and on my desk come xmas time - its a hit at the office

Islamic ChoCoHoLic said...

i want that fluufy thing in the pic! lol soo cute!!!
nice blog :)

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