Monday, December 03, 2007

passive agression and its practical application

Commune-living fast deflates the bubble of stoicism.
There lived amongst us one who seemed to consume anything that intersected with her marauding path. Some of it hearsay, most of it confirmed testimony; no consumable was safe.
I too had not escaped unscathed. But for many of the incidents, I did not feel the confrontation worth the effort.
Until I opened the grocery cupboard to find a measly trickle of concentrate pooling at the bottom of the Oros bottle, just enough to give a glass of water a pathetic jaundiced hue.
Still reeling from that discovery, I opened the fridge to find that all the margarine had been used, with nothing but feeble streaks clinging to the sides of the container.
This act of utter inconsideration and disgusting show of bad manners prompted me to action.

I assume it was the tokoloshe that used up all my Oros. I don't mind, since I'm sure the little fucker gets thirsty too.
However, it's only good etiquette to replace what you use or at the very least, inform the owner so that she may purchase more Oros, so that herself and other tokoloshes also have the pleasure of enjoying a refreshing drink.

The Marvel of the Mysteriously Minimising Margarine. More tokoloshes at work?
Please forward your theories to me."

This exercise in passive aggression yielded a 50% return in that the margarine was replaced by one of the house-mates.
However, it was not the one with the locust bent who 'fessed up and the Oros issue was never resolved.
The marauder has since moved out.
Perhaps now the other housemates will consider it safe to liberate their groceries from their bedrooms.


SingleGuy said...

I wonder if the same House-mate was involved in the earlier Garment Debacle?

AAAAH...A houseful of it true that if you live with a lot of women, your menstrual cycles start to co-ordinate?

bb_aisha said...

When i was at campus,we found a 4 bedrm we got 2 girls to share.the first was fine when it was just the 3 of us,but when the witch moved in-who at first fooled us with her false sweetness-trouble began. At first we all shared groceries,but then it became obvious they weren't contributing.their friends would visit,and would be offered sweets from our sweet bowl kept in the lounge. It was petty to mention at first,and i hated the thought of keeping things in room.i also put up a list-rotating the buying of milk and bread,sugar etc,but it didnt work.i then said we should buy our own stuff. It mostly worked,altho the witch indulged in our stuff a few times.once,i bought cake and was looking forward to having it with my evening tea,only to discover she ate it.aargh! alham,my egypt flatmates were darlings.we didnt have any problems. But i'd be wary of sharing again with anybody else.

r said...

lol! Saals do you really need this frustration in your life?? SG: its true.

saaleha. bamjee. hyphen. said...

SG - We suspect that she was indeed.
And yes, the cycles do tend to synchronise. Apparently it has to do with pheromones.

BB & R - I'm moving out end December. Going to be sharing with two of the more balanced housemates for the two and a half months before the wedding.

Anonymous said...

eish, u missed out on an opportunity to open a can of whipa$$, and not a 200ml can, a huge can, one of then 'fan cans, 450ml.....hehehehehe. see, cos ppl like that, they respond to only one kinda treatment......and thats unleashing some great vengeance and fury upon them! else u couldve spiked the oros with some laxative. damn that wudve been fun! and then u just give that evil grin, and start to laugh, as dr evil would do to austin powers, MUWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHA! eat that dirt bag! no pun intended. hehehhe

peace out ur'll

The chosen one!

PS, damn funny story, even the pants one was funny, but this one is funnier.

The Organ Harvester said...

ja boet, that's life on the mean streets of digs life. Waar.

Best time living in digs, when I was living on my own. It's never having to apologise for leaving a cup in the sink or finding that someone drank all the oros.

Once though someone ate my halaal steak. We shall call him buried in a shallow unmarked grave. Might have have been english.

Eish let's hope hubby doesnt think to blame the tokoloshe for socks lieing around and finishing the Oros ne?


Dew said...

good one..wish i had the guts to do something like that.

SG: It sure does

ZK said...

saals is moving in with me lol and she calls me the balanced housemate lol
R please inform her of my imbalance nature to fall over lol
o well the whip ass was opened by me and yes my temper did let fly coz the little fucker has taken my jacket...
the Days of our Lives

Thembelihle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Thembelihle said...

ciwaOkay so this is what the Tokoloshes that live in the confort of their homes should know about living away from home. I love my Oros so I'm sure there would be war if any of my Oros was taken without my go ahead.

You write well girl, i could actually see the tokoloshe sneaking her phalanges into the grocery cupboard.

Anonymous said...

my god.
first the pants
then the oros and margarine...

what next??


Profane. Profound. What's your poison?