Wednesday, November 29, 2006

the well-meaning spammer

There's a road to a place that's paved with this stuff:

From: [id withheld to maintain privacy of offender]
To: undisclosed-recipients
Date: Nov 29, 2006 12:23PM
Subject: FW: Please forward and R2.00 will be donated

Subject: Guys, please let us help this little girl, for God knows and hear her cry.

Hi, my name is Surita Diputs Naidoo and I live in
Chatsworth, South Africa.
I am 8 years old, and I have been in a hit and run accident with a taxi.

My 14 year old brother was killed instantly, and my father later died at RK Khan's Hospital, Chatsworth.
My mother and I are now living with my grandparents.
The doctors have told me that I need corrective surgery as my face and arms were badly burned in the accident.
Fortunately, my plight was brought to the attention of a wealthy Herbal Importer in
Reservoir Hills, South Africa, who, with the help of IBM, have promised to give me R2 for every person this e-mail is forwarded to.

Please send to as many people as you can and GOD bless.
Remember, have a heart.


Surita Diputs Naidoo

Unit 9

Chatsworth

Durban

South Africa



Well-meaning spam: when bad judgement happens to good people.
Now when i hear the phrase "wealthy Herbal Importer from Reservoir Hills", the first thing I'm going to ask is "How much for a bankie Boss?".
I sure hope the Omniscient Entities at IBM, Microsoft, MacDonalds, Pepsi, Coca Cola and [insert multinational developing-world-pillaging corporate goliath here] will use the software given to them by the aliens/David Icke's reptile people to track this email to my blog and give unfortunate Surita Diputs Naidoo from Unit 9 in Chatsworth two whole rands for every person who reads this.

Remember, have a brain. God knows and hears your cry.

6 comments:

Muhammad said...

Taht was weird, I had something similar abouthelping this retarded 10 year old in the states whose mother married her brother and her uncle at the same time and was in dire need of reconstructive surgery because she was bron wit ha breast on her forehead... herbrother and uncle were bankruptand her mother was a housewife, but by some miracle a local shoe company said they would donate her a pair of shoes for every 200 mails that get forwarded.

So I did it, I admit... but hey, with a breast on your forehead.. you gonna need good shoes to run away from the boys, right?

M.

Anonymous said...

you are so so pretty:p

saaleha said...

anonymous: i know where you work.

SingleGuy said...

haha...M. That was well put. Ok, take from a guy with a basis in biological science...it is impossible to grow a breast on your forehead....your forhead is not anywhere on the line that possible accessory breasts might grow, you know, like a third or fourth nipple.

Now....has anyone noticed how Surita's middle name is STUPID spelt backwards?...I mean if you're going to make a hoax email, don't put clues like that so blatantly obvious, it takes the fun out of it for those of us with more than half a brain!

Anonymous said...

I agree with anonymous- you are gorgeous!

zee said...

yeah i hate those emails...but that doesnt mean that i wont forward it to u and mak at the first opp i get :)

and singleguy...good spotting...shit i would never have picked that up :))))) stupid spelt backwards...sheesh, who comes up with this stuff and moreover who has time to do all this?

of course i am pretty sure that poor surita does in fact exist and that that addy is her real addy...shame someone must really hate her...i feel bad for her u know.

Profane. Profound. What's your poison?