Tuesday, May 15, 2007

"look for wisdom and you'll find it anywhere.."

I heart spam of the non-spiced-porcine variety.

Stock tips, cheap Xanax, the quadrillions I've won in Zimbabwean lotteries, the offers of easy sex and perkier mammaries, the nice people who want to give me money to help them with fund transfers; all contribute towards making me a wealthier and more desirable human being. And now these noble spammers have provided me with cogent aphorisms that simply must (must, i tell you) be shared with the rest of the blogosphere:

  • If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.
  • Life is hardly more than a fraction of a second. Such a little time to prepare oneself for eternity!
  • A grave blockhead should always go about with a lively one -- they show one another off to the best advantage.
  • It takes three to make a child.
  • All my life through, the new sights of Nature made me rejoice like a child.
  • Flowers are happy things.
  • Politeness is the art of choosing among one's real thoughts.
  • Give me one friend, just one, who meets The needs of all my varying moods.
  • Fearless minds climb soonest into crowns.
  • Luck? Sure. But only after long practice and only with the ability to think under pressure.
  • There's only one free person in this society, and he is white and male.
  • Finally, be strong in the Lord, and in the strength of His might. [Ephesians 6:10]
  • The business that considers itself immune to the necessity for advertising sooner or later finds itself immune to business.

3 comments:

Fatima said...

Funniest: It takes three to make a child.

Sweetest: Flowers are happy things :)

I love going through spam on days when there's nothing inviting in my inbox. There really are some dynamite pieces out there. Lol!

CorpseKicker said...

I like these more:

Politeness is to human nature what warmth is to wax. ~Arthur Schopenhauer
Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911

Muhammad said...

Making a quick buck and contributing to the arts. I love it :)

Profane. Profound. What's your poison?